01 September 2009

Identity Crisis


I like to think that I know myself pretty well. I know what I believe, what matters most in my life and I am generally not shy about saying what I think. It took me time to get to this place in my life, and I'm by no means a finished person. In fact, I'm convinced that we never really stop changing. How could we? Each day we're presented with new ideas, learning opportunities and thus gain insight where before we had none. At one of the best weddings I ever worked at (I had a brief stint of wedding photography for an amazing photographer) the minister talked about how the person they were marrying now would not be, he hoped, the same person they would be married to tomorrow, next week, in the coming years. The guests looked confused, surely the minister was not advocating for divorce at this stage of the game? He then explained that we all change, as I mentioned, and that for a successful marriage to work we had to realize that at every stage of the game we needed to reevaluate who we were, who our spouses were and what we needed to be happy and healthy. Now, as I parent there is one more person that is added to the mix. Since her birth Little Nib has had a very huge place in the Big Cheese's and my life; however, she has not had much say in it. That is beginning to change. The last few weeks has seen LN get more and more independent, she has definite wants and needs now, a set way of doing things and ideas all her own. I'm excited for her to add her two cents to our four. We always said that our child(ren) will have an equal say in most decision making processes. I think that we're getting to that point now, although bed time is still non-negotiable. I like the flux and flow in life, things are constantly moving and changing.

Where am I going with this? Bear with me.

This brings us to this blog. I originally started it so that I could have a creative outlet. Something to focus on, plan for and generally use my brain on. There are a lot of things that I want to say in this space but, and here's the rub, I'm not sure how to do it. From the get go I invited everybody I knew to read my latest posts; friends, family, internet acquaintances. They know my real name, who BC and LN are. I like that, most days. I'm struggling to find my blog identity, decide what I want to put out there, how I say it and generally how I want to present myself out here...in the World Wide Web. These are not easy decisions. Am I funny? Serious? Am I a 'mommy blogger'? Do I write reviews? Share personal stories? Give advice? I jumped into this blog with both feet. My main goal has been to write everyday, Monday through Friday. Most of the time I've accomplished that. I want to be able to change how I think and feel and react to things. I don't want to pigeon hole myself as a certain 'type' of blogger. I don't see myself as a 'mommy' blogger, an 'inspirational' blogger or any other type at all. I'm here writing and I just hope that someone, somewhere gets Something out of it. Because most days, I think I do. Feel free to weigh in at any time with your thoughts. I really would love to hear them.

Fellow bloggers:
How do you define yourself out here on the web?
Are there things that are off limits?

Everyone else:
What do you see/read on your blog roll?
Are there any topics that are off limits?

6 comments:

  1. but I thought the best wedding you ever went to was the young christian couple that made out the whole time.

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  2. seriously though, just be your fantastic self. let it come from your heart and not from who you think you should be or based on what other bloggers do.
    no topics are off limits. in fact, i think people, especially women and mothers, are starved for those off-limit topics that are often repressed.

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  3. You mean the wedding where the bride had her first kiss at the alter? And her father gave her a new purity ring every year on her birthday and she got married at 22? Yeah...that one was interesting. Especially after her dad made a comment about them not stopping at the B&B they were staying in that night before they went to the reception...he said he wanted her to 'walk normal' during the reception. Nice.

    Thank you dear Celia, you have such a wonderful, gentle way of reminding me to just be myself. :)

    ReplyDelete
  4. I've really enjoyed reading your blogs and found them to be very interesting. We rarely get to share these thoughts in the midst of family get-togethers, so it's fun to hear your opinion on non-Welters-related issues! You shouldn't worry about what other people think or what 'type' of blogger you turn out to be. If readers don't like it they will stop reading - and those who stop reading shouldn't be caterred to if they have different interests than you.

    Erin

    ReplyDelete
  5. I think it is your blog and you should write about what you want and how you want. Otherwise you would not write a blog or you would pay someone else to write it for you. :)

    Personally, I wish I could get more personal on my blog - my thoughts, feelings, hopes, desires, etc... - but I don't for the sake of my husband and because I want to keep it light... but I like reading other people's blogs that are more personal. I never blog about work - as I want to keep my job. :)

    I agree with Erin, too - you have to write what you want and if people don't like it - who cares. They were not your right audience.

    Best of luck!

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  6. Thank you, thank you for making me feel justified in writing whatever I want. At some point I would love for this blog to have 'a point', but for right now I'm happily writing whatever I want...and who knows, that may never change!

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